I had a debate a few weeks ago with a man on
twitter, who felt black feminist hindered the progress of black men in America.
I honestly never heard of something so divisive in my life. How do my rights as
a woman, and demands for respect and equality even challenge you as a man? I
honestly don't know of any instances where black women have had to choose one
over the other, and when I asked him that, he had absolutely no answer. I'm
guessing that he forgot when the right to vote was giving to black men, that black
women chose their husbands, brothers and sons over their own fight for women's
right. That's when I realized he like most people have a skewed understanding
of what being pro woman is. Simply put pro woman is not, I repeat, is not about
being anti man.
I'm not into labels, but I notice a lot of my
pro women ideals may fall into the feminism category, also all my pro women
ideals directly correlate to my pro black ideals. Which are to be treated and
respected equally to everyone else. I want that for women, and I want that for
black people. Why do people always have to make things be a "this vs.
that" situation? He asked me what rights I need he doesn't. Excuse me, are
you not aware of my uterus sir? Have you ever heard of equal but different?
Clearly my reproductive rights, my rights to equal pay, and rights to not be
put on trail when I'm actually the rape victim apply to me and not him. His
language alone, very combative and defensive, his mind, closed to any new ideas
or information I gave. Are you sure you're for the cause brother? Or are you
just spitting out pointless facts you read, and memorized from a book but
hardly took the time to digest and fully comprehend what you've read?
I kindly walked away from that debate, because
I realized he didn't actually want to exchange ideas, he actually just wanted
to spit out hate speech which, really had me wonder, who hurt him? Basically he
was a block head with no space for new thoughts, a closed mind but an open
mouth. Now I sit and wonder how many black men think this way about black
women. We stand by all of your stuff, good, bad and the butt ugly, we date,
marry and procreate outside our race far less than black men (not an
issue for me, love is love regardless of color) but because we have pro
woman values also, I've turned my back on you? The conversation with that man
on twitter was definitely a lost cause; he seriously needs a reality check. My
lesson at the end of the discussion, not only do I not debate with the
ignorant, I will no longer debate with the self righteous. They both have
equally closed minds, and leave no room for anything new.