To most people I am cool as a cucumber. I get excited about things that make me happy but I am definitely someone that seems to have it all together, but I still suffer from anxiety which is something most may never know. My wedding day for example everyone commented on how I was such a chill bride and seemed to be handling things so well. On the inside though I was FREAKING out. This is normal, most brides go through that moment of OH MY GOD this is happening but for me. It was a fear that was so much more than that. The moments I had to myself before walking down the aisle were filled with tears, hands trembling and making myself take deep breaths from keeping from having a panic attack. To everyone else around me I was fine. This is normal for me but I am understanding it doesn't have to be. It is perfectly okay to embrace your emotions regardless of what they may be. I acknowledge that I have anxiety sometimes I have known for a long time but I am finally able to admit it openly and with no fear of how people will view me.
So what does this mean exactly? It means that I will no longer force myself to hide from people for fear of being judged. Learning to cope and keep it under control is super important to me but it doesn't mean I need to downplay how I am truly feeling to make others think I am fine. I am learning to be okay with admitting I am perfectly flawed and becoming closer to embracing it everyday.

Twitter @emazing17, Instagram @emazing17 and snapchat @Emazing1787
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