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Wzup, Wzup, WZUP!!!! *Cues Martin theme song* It's been a hot and long minute ya'll, but ya girl is back and better than ever. I've been living, learning, loving, and growing, and I've picked up a few things along the way that I'd like to share with you. First and foremost, I learned something about myself in the past few months that I am not fond of. The beauty of growth, however, is that we have room to evolve. I learned that I have the tendency to shrink myself along with my values and belief around others in an effort to make them more comfortable and to fit in. In this new day, I realize I am a giant, and like a giant, I can't help others, fulfill my purpose, or manifest my vision by playing small in any regard.
- . I downplay my talents and ideas to seem less intimidating to others. This might sound crazy, but its the truth. I have been told on numerous occasions that I am too much, or too crazy, or intimidating. So, as a defense mechanism, I resolved to speak up last.
- I seldom share or celebrate good news. When something positive occurs in my life, I share it with my man and keep it on lock. I don't like to share with others who are also climbing because I don't want to appear boastful.
- When I am complimented, I deflect the praise by sharing a flaw. Them: "Your hair is so cute!" Me: "Girl, it was only 5.99 at the beauty supply store. Nothing fancy." It's like I subconsciously believe I don't deserve love and praise. Therefore, countering compliments became my defense.
- I often sought confirmation or reassurance about a move from others. A new hairdo, relationships, outfit ideas, or etc, would need to be affirmed by someone who I felt knew more than me or opinions I valued greatly. In doing this, I found my own confidence in certain decisions had dwindled.
- When faced with an opposing view, comment or action, I did not advocate for myself. Occasions when folks say or do hurtful things, in an effort to avoid confrontation, I turned the other cheek. Not seeking revenge or disturbing piece is a beautiful thing, until one own self-esteem is tormented.
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